Closed Doors
by kaneki-coffee
Summary: Haise decided to tag along when Juuzou wanted to visit the hospital to visit his mentor. But when he accidentally opens an occupied room, he meets Hide, a dying CCG officer that seems...familiar to Haise. He can't help feeling hopeful that the officer might live. But why? They had just met recently. He shouldn't care so much. But he does.


"Haise!" Juuzou called, flinging his arms out and grinning happily. "You came!" He ran along the edge of the sidewalk, balancing on the curb with expert precision as his black coat whipped behind him, buffeted by the wind.

"Morning," Haise greeted, smiling in welcome. He stuffed a hand in his pocket and pulled out a baggy of snacks he had baked the night before. He lifted them above his head, teasing Juuzou. The smaller inspector leapt off the curb, landing lightly on his feet a few inches from Haise. He tilted his head to stare up at the bag.

"Cookies?" He guessed, jumping slightly in the air and hanging on Haise's arm until the bag dropped into reach. He snatched it and turned it over in his hands, tossing it in the air. Catching the bag easily, he held it up to his face, pressing his eye against the shiny surface. "It looks delicious, as always!" The bag crinkled loudly as he lowered it and opened it.

Haise smiled, watching Juuzou stuff cookies into his mouth. He looked like a chipmunk stuffing nuts into his cheeks. Crumbs speckled the front of his coat. Haise covered a smile with the back of his hand, pretending to yawn. Hanbee would not be pleased to see that.

"So!" Juuzou managed, his mouth full of cookies. "Are you ready to go? It's just around the corner." He glanced at the sun, squinting in the bright light. "It's about the time I always visit."

Haise shrugged his shoulders, gesturing for them to walk. "Lead on," he grinned, falling into step behind Juuzou. Juuzou tossed the empty bag into a trashcan and jumped back onto the curb, sticking his hands out to balance himself. Haise strolled beside him, hands in his coat pockets.

"Do you visit him often?" Haise asked as they turned the corner. He dodged a mother pushing a stroller, pausing as Juuzou knelt to look at the baby. He stuck his tongue out at the child, causing her to scream and the mother to scold them. Haise pulled Juuzou away, apologizing over his shoulder.

"I try to visit every few days," Juuzou said, tugging his arm from Haise's grasp. "His room is right there. When he wakes up, he'll have the best view." He pointed at a window of the hospital building.

"Juuzou," Haise laughed. "I can't tell which you're pointing at. There's at least a hundred windows."

Juuzou looked back up at the building, cocking his head to the side. "Huh." He shrugged, obviously tired of the conversation, and skipped to the front doors, Haise striding next to him. The doors opened automatically, and the receptionist looked up, smiling. She spotted Juuzou and waved in greeting, pointing them to the right direction before returning to her phone call. Juuzou nodded back in greeting, turning to walk backwards to face Haise. He somehow managed to avoid running into the other people that crowded the hall, mildly impressing Haise. He made a mental note to ask him how he managed it. Juuzou always seemed to know more than everyone else, despite his childlike manner.

"So how did Hanbee manage to get you to come? I told him I was fine on my own. I don't need people to come along on my visits." Juuzou stuck his hands in his pockets and chewed on the stitches in his lower lip. Haise wondered if they itched. They turned right at a crossroads in the hall, entering an emptier hall. Only a few people wandered.

"He said he would take my squad out to lunch once he was done with his work. Saiko wouldn't let me refuse, and I wasn't about to either, if it meant she got out of the house." He shrugged. "Besides, I don't mind. He seems worried about you, and if coming along with you makes him feel better, who am I to say no?"

Juuzou sighed, turning back around to face forward. "Hanbee worries too much." He halted in front of a closed door, glancing at Haise over his shoulder. "Do you want to come in with me?"

Haise backed up in alarm, raising his hands. "Oh, no, I couldn't. Not Inspector Shinohara! I don't even know him! I'll just wait out here until you're done. Go on in and keep him company." He shooed Juuzou into the room, closing the door behind him as he stepped back into the hallway.

He looked around the empty hallway and sighed, bored already. He could find a quiet place to read, he supposed. Arima had just given him a book, and he didn't really want to keep it too long. There weren't any benches nearby, but he was sure he had seen one before, near the front desk. With a new goal in mind, Haise wandered back down the hall, dodging people as he reentered the busy crossroad.

He turned left, retracing his steps to the front, until a voice yelled out, surprising him and those surrounding him. "Out of the way!" A nurse was pushing a cot across the hallway, moving as fast as he could. Haise scrambled to get out of his path, hastily opening a closed door and stepping in. The lights were off and the windows closed—it looked unoccupied. He breathed a sigh of relief and turned to watch the nurse barrel past with the patient. Blood was splattered on the cot, and the patient's lower body. It didn't look like they were going to make it, but Haise kept his thoughts to himself.

Certain that the coast was clear now, Haise moved to step out into the hallway. He paused however, hearing a rustle of sheets behind him. He turned, suspicious. Was the room not empty like he first thought?

"Turn on the light, would ya?" A voice croaked, obviously not in use very much.

Haise groaned inwardly, scratching the back of his head with a hand. Definitely occupied then. "I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean to disturb you." He flicked on the light and walked in a little, seeing who he had walked in on.

It was a young blonde man, laying in bed, smiling weakly. He seemed to be attached to a machine and a heart rate monitor; the machine gave off a steady beat, but flickered unevenly on the screen. Tubes decorated his arms and his face. He was pale, sickly pale. His eyes widened a bit, before he squinted at Haise.

"Kaneki?" He asked, struggling to sit up. He failed, falling back down, too weak to get up. He huffed, blowing a bit of hair from his face.

"I'm sorry," Haise replied, curiously. "Who?" He opened his jacket, pulling out his ID. His finger snagged on his book, and he pulled it out as well to keep it from falling. He shoved it under his arm as he lifted his badge. "Rank 1 Investigator, Sasaki Haise!" He saluted, grinning broadly. He paused, frowning slightly. Why had he smiled? Shaking his head to clear it, he returned his ID to his coat pocket. "I work under Mado Akira."

The man's eyes widened again and he barked out a harsh laugh, rubbing his face with his hands. "Akira? Of course you do." He turned his head to face Haise again. "You can call me Hide. I worked for Akira at one point as well. The Owl Suppression Operation? Sound familiar? I was part of that." He grimaced, memories coming back to him. "I was injured badly, fell into a coma. I woke up a few months ago, haven't been able to leave yet. Apparently, nobody thought to tell me that…well, nobody tells me anything anymore." He sounded bitter, and Haise made a small noise of sympathy, walking forward a little more.

"Do you mind?" He asked, gesturing to a chair beside the bed. A vase of fresh flowers decorated the table beside it, giving off a sweet scent that stirred feelings Haise couldn't quite place. He shrugged, not able to place the smell. It would come to him.

He waited until Hide nodded before he sat down, placing his book on the table. "So you've been in a coma that long?" Haise asked, amazed. It had been years, at least. He whistled. "Long time. Do you know how come-a?" He paused, grinning saucily, fingers poised dramatically in the air at his own pun. He sat there, posed, processing the pun he had just used. Not even a second later he was covering his face with his hands. "I'm so sorry. Forgive me. That was rude and uncalled for, and I shouldn't have said that."

Hide laughed loudly, shocked. "Oh, god. A pun? That's a first." He gasped in pain, clutching his side. "Oh, ow. Okay, please don't make me laugh," he wheezed. Haise winced visibly, wishing to sink into his chair and disappear.

"I am sorry," he apologized. "I'm usually better than this. I just met you, and I'm already forcing you to suffer through my bad jokes. You can't even run away like the others." He opened his mouth in horror. "Oh, god. That was bad too, wasn't it? I'm just going to shut up now." He closed his mouth, feeling his cheeks blush red.

Hide laughed again, flinching as pain racked through his body. "Ouch," he muttered. A machine beeped in warning. "I know, I know," he moaned, twisting to whack it with his fist. It quieted, but the screen was flashing warnings. His face was paler than before, Haise noticed.

"I can leave," he said hastily, rising from his chair.

"No!" Hide shouted in alarm. He quieted, coughing. "Stay with me a little longer? I don't get many visitors." Haise turned to glance at the fresh flowers. He could smell the scents from outside. Someone had obviously brought them in, and recently. He shrugged to himself. It's not like was doing anything anyway. Juuzou would be staying with his teacher for at least another fifteen minutes. He settled back into he chair, sitting on the edge of his seat and leaning forward, bracing his elbows on his knees and balancing his chin on his hands.

Hide shifted in his bed uncomfortably, pulling the hospital gown away from his neck. It fluttered onto his chest slowly. Haise watched, noticing the uneven breaths he took.

"So," he began slowly, not sure of what to say. "What are you in here for? I mean, if you woke up a few months ago, why are you still here?"

"I was stupid." Hide turned his face away, mouth puckering in distaste. "Y'know, I was younger than. Didn't really think of what I was doing, right? My friend—no, he was more than a friend. He…he had gotten caught up in the investigation. I was trying to help him escape, and I got hurt in the process." He turned back to Haise, eyes wide. "I don't blame him!" He insisted, his voice rising.

Haise blinked, startled. "I never said you did," he assured, scooting his chair forward. "Don't get too excited, you might hurt yourself."

Hide sighed. "Organ damage." Haise stared blankly at him, then realized he was answering his question. "Apparently I'm going to die. Doctors say it's only a matter of time. They've done almost all they can. I had sort of accepted my fate, but now…something came up. Now I think…I think I'm going to try to fight it."

"Is there a way to fight it?" Haise asked, worried.

The bed creaked as Hide shifted again, wincing in pain. "Yes." He didn't continue.

"Well?" Haise prompted. He had to admit, he was hopeful. He didn't want Hide to die. What about him caused Haise to feel so strongly? He had just met him, for god's sakes. It's not like they were close. He just felt…familiar. He felt like home. Haise cut off the thought abruptly, his head pounding in pain. It was like a loud thunderous heartbeat in his brain, ricocheting and echoing off each corner of his mind. The pain was indescribable. He tried to backtrack. What was he thinking of before? He scrambled to collect his thoughts, to remember, but it was too late—the thought was gone.

He glanced up, hoping Hide hadn't noticed his small mental breakdown. He hadn't. He was staring at the vase of flowers, deep in thought. Haise coughed into his hand, catching his attention.

"Could you come back next week?" Hide asked quietly, still lost in his own thoughts. "If I'm still alive then, I should be fine then. I should make it regardless. I found my reason to live." He smiled weakly at Haise. Haise smiled back encouragingly, not quite sure what Hide was saying.

Hide coughed. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to make a call to my doctor."

Haise stood up hastily, knocking the chair back and into the table. He grabbed the vase of flowers before it sloshed over. "Of course! I'm sorry I stayed so long. I…I enjoyed talking to you. It was nice." He repositioned the chair and grabbed his book, luckily saved from water damage, and walked to the door. He glanced back only when Hide called out.

"You will come back, right, Kaneki?" He sounded anxious.

"Of course," Haise replied without thinking, not noticing the name misusage. "Always."

He stepped out the door, closing it with a quiet click. The hallway was just as busy as before, if not maybe a little quieter. He strolled back to the room he had dropped Juuzou off at, spotting him sewing stitches on his arm in boredom quietly on the floor.

"Sorry, Juuzou," Haise called. "I got distracted." He walked over, watching Juuzou expertly pull out the thread and tuck the needle into his pocket. He stretched out a hand to lift him up, which Juuzou accepted gladly.

"Haise?" He asked curiously. "Why are you crying?"

Haise brought a hand to his face, pulling away a finger flecked with tear drops. All of a sudden, he could feel a deep sadness crash down onto him, knocking him off his feet. He gasped, staggering, and clutched his heart. What? Where had this loneliness come from? It was painful, an ache in his heart he couldn't seem to rid himself of. He took a deep breath, blinking his eyes repeatedly to try to stop crying. He struggled to wipe the tears away, but more kept spilling over and running down his cheeks.

Juuzou patted him on the back. "It'll be okay," he said simply. "You'll remember soon. It was bound to happen."

Haise looked up through his tears, squinting in confusion. What would he remember? Why? He didn't think he wanted to know, not from the stories he had heard. He had been a monster. A creature of destruction, half mad and crazy with power. He had been saved! But he couldn't deny the nagging feeling that he was missing something. Something important. Something he had just found, and was struggling to remember.

"It's okay," Juuzou repeated, pulling Haise back up. "We'll come back. You have some time to think until then."


End file.
